A Very Fond Farewell!
Well gentlemen we have made it! I'm proud of those of you who have managed to plug through the last nine chapters with me. It shows there is some of you who care enough to try to find some answers to your problems and make your relationship better.
I don't know that I have been of much help to you. I hope if nothing else you come away knowing there are some women in this world who are aware of your plight in life and we care. We don't come with a whole bunch of sympathy but we do try to understand why you do the things you do. Lord knows we try to understand.
I want to remind you as I said in my first chapter I am following up immediately with the Back To Basic's For Women. Why should I pick on just the men of the world when I am so full of advice for everyone? I have a theory. Those who can teach and those who can't just preach and peach and preach. I'm not sure what category I fall into.
For a farewell topic I thought we could just round off some of the subjects we have covered. Just to help you refresh yourself on what the hell you started reading this for in the first place.
To start with remember; if you love your mate and they love you COMMUNICATE for crying out loud! Don't be scared to speak your mind, (in a nice way please).
Before you open your mouth THINK! You may find you would like to change your mind. It may help you stop feeling like you are always using you foot for a chew toy.
Be kind in your criticism of others. They are also your critics when you're not around and you're not listening.
Respect your mate! Honor them with your loyalty. Chase away the shadows and doubts by being a good faithful person. This will also make for much smoother sailing in a relationship.
Don't be afraid to show your love. You will find it always comes back to you. It is my opinion; there isn't nearly enough love and caring shown in this world. It is almost as if we have become afraid of affection.
Share yourself with you mate. This is the only way they can get to really know you. It will also help them share themselves with you. You will find a whole new world by looking to your mate for this.
Never leave the house with out looking in the mirror first. Give the world a chance to see you, not a scary fashion statement. Remember easy on the after shave.
Control your anger. Remember anger is just a human's way of saying I have lost control. Losing control is just a lack of understanding those things around you.
Accept the fact that you can't control all things. Give yourself a break and let your mate handle things once in awhile. They are as capable as you are in many ways. Leave the door open so you both know there isn't any shame in asking for help.
Keep your sense of humor. Its very true life is short. Why not have a chuckle while your here? Laughing at yourself once in awhile is good for the soul. Trust me on this one I am constantly leaving myself in stitches.
Leave the mothering up to your Mom. Your mate should be your mate, nothing more nothing less. They aren't a substitute for anything or anyone else.
Don't sell yourself short you have a lot to contribute to your relationship. If your mate didn't think so I highly doubt you would be together.
Experiment once in a while sexually. Be brave and express some of your feelings or even fantasies to your mate. Just try not to shock them beyond repair. Do your homework on this one guys.
Yes chauvinism is dead but we still want to be treated as ladies, well most of us do anyway. As far as I'm concerned you can never fail with good manors. I have five brothers, all of them full of beans. But I am always proud to say my Mom did a good job raising her gentlemen. They know how to treat a lady and they always make me proud.
Don't be afraid to let your mate see you have emotions. They're in love with you and they will love that part of you too. We don't usually want soft men but we like to know you aren't a cold hard stone.
Be a kind person to those in your life. We all appreciate a sweet word or gesture. To some of us it can make our whole day. I was just surprised today with tickets to a baseball game. This inexpensive gift will make the rest of my week for me. I was surprised and touched that my mate remembered how badly I wanted to go. Little things do mean a lot. To most of us anyway.
Be an honest, fair and trust worthy man to all who come into your life. Your behavior will be remembered long after you are no longer on this earth.
Don't try to hide from the negatives in your life. By meeting your problem's head on and with the right frame of mind, you are already half way to fixing things for the better.
Be tolerant of each other's past. Try to deal with it and then let it go. There are far greater things that will haunt you than the ghosts of our past.
Share with your mate. If you want to have, what I consider a true relationship. Then remember this means there will be at least two if not more of you. We are taught to share as children and then we lose that quality when we grow up. Sharing simply makes for a more relaxed and fun time for all to have. It sure wouldn't hurt some grown-ups to pay attention to the little one's once in a while.
Don't insult or hurt the other people in your mate's life. Her friends and family mean a lot to her. Your true character will always show when you are dealing with them.
Pitch in and help your mate. Roll up you sleeve's and wash the dishes or (God forbid) change a diaper if need be. Your actions will not go unnoticed. Remember that extra time shows promise for fun.
Let your mate know they are special to you. Don't be a hound dog and stare at every female that goes by. To a woman this kind of treatment is really degrading. It will defiantly not endear you to her. All you have to remember is how you would feel if you saw her looking at every hunk in her radius.
Try to understand what a woman's world is like. We have a whole bunch of stuff going on in our lives. You have a bunch of stuff going on too. I personally don't envy you men at all. Any way we all have stuff. If we could somehow see each other as just a person trying to deal with stuff, then we might see each other as a person before we see anything else.
I'm not saying we should all feel sorry for each other. Sympathy is a totally useless emotion, in my humble opinion. I am saying is have some understanding for each other, in our own rights. We all have a hell of a lot to deal with.
Remember there are absolutely no rulebooks on life! (Trust me I have looked) Do the best you can, have a whole bunch of faith and a good sense of humor. Remember you are a human and as such unable to ever reach perfection.
Finally I want to say I have really enjoyed writing this. I hope I have somehow helped to shown you that some women do want to understand the men in our lives. We haven't got all the answers but we can try. If I can walk away knowing some of you have gotten this point then my job as a writer is done. And I thank you gentlemen so very much for your time!
End
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